When Things are not Going Well
Updated: Dec 8, 2019
We all have days when things are not going well. You’re grouchy. You’re tired. You have no cream for your coffee. Maybe, like me, you spilled an entire bag of coffee over your kitchen floor, and you can’t really remember the last time you cleaned it.Whatever the reason, you find yourself spiralling and you know an explosion is imminent. So what do you do? In my humble opinion, you have two options.
You can dig deep. Fill that empty well with all the self-care you have in your repertoire; meditation, a nature walk, a long bubble bath, a workout, or whatever wonderful thing you can do for yourself that you know will lift you back up.
You can utterly surrender to your emotions. Surrender does not mean give up. It means give in. Accept your emotional state. Do you feel tears welling in your eyes? Let them fall. Crying is shown to release stress hormones after all. Put on your favourite sad song and belt it out.
Maybe you’re angry. Go for a drive and yell your loudest! Whatever is trapped inside, get it out. Then give yourself a little down time. Watch your favourite feel good movie or break out your hidden stash of good quality chocolate and slowly savour each bite. Don’t just shove it in your mouth quickly so you’re children don’t know you’re eating chocolate in the bathroom again (who me?) Own it. Treat yourself like the tired, weary soul that you are and gently bring yourself back to equilibrium.
This is the way we regulate our emotions. This is how we model that very important work to our children so they know what to do when they come across those tough days. Because tough days come to all of us.
Let’s not lash out, stomp around the house, or slam doors. Let’s get to the heart of the matter by asking ourselves, “What do I NEED right now?”
Maybe you want to elevate, maybe you want to indulge. If you pause for long enough, you’ll know what choice to make, and soon enough, things will be looking good again.